Monday, January 31, 2011


I got a job today.  At a travel agency that books river rafting trips down the Grand Canyon, among other places.  I cannot begin to tell you how excited I am!  I met the owners today...they actually came by the store to interview me!  They're so nice.  Down to earth.  Good people.  Taking a river trip this summer changed my daughters life & now I get to be a part of something so cool!  The agency is called Rivers & Oceans.  I start on Thursday.  It's going to be an incredible ride!

Tuesday, January 25, 2011


My daughter just had her first experience with losing a friend. A boy in her class died yesterday (they're not saying how/why but suicide is implied). Her dad & I didn't know him...but he was in her 3rd period. So he's someone she saw every day. She's so lost...and as her parents, we're not quite sure what to do. She won't talk to us, so I've asked my brother & a few friends to check on her periodically. All we can do is be here for her...get her help if she needs it. And be here for her...

Saturday, January 22, 2011

Collage Painting

In October 2009 I went to a retreat in Oregon.  The big draw of the retreat was that Kelly Rae Roberts was teaching a class in collage painting.  Well, that & the fact that it was on the beach...& there was photography & yoga...& that my friend Kim wanted to go didn't hurt either.  I didn't expect to fall in love with Kelly Rae's style of painting.  I'm no where near her caliber, but I love it just the same.  Here's the painting I made today:

I used a Scrabble board that has been sitting around the house for a while as the base.  I totally love it!  Eventually I think I'll frame it so it stands out from the wall better, but this is the first time I've created something & rushed home & hung it right on the wall.  Here are some photos of getting here:

This just made me happy today.  Seriously happy.

Thursday, January 20, 2011

Nothing earth shattering

has happened this week.  I've been hanging out with Krista at the store.  She's getting the hang of the register...of the inventory system.  There are so many things to do, yet we seem to just kinda wander through the day.  We'll get our bearings...soon, I hope.  But for now, we're trying to resolve little things...merchant services....meeting reps...meeting customers.  Feels like I'm training an employee...but not.  There's so much to running a business.  How do you condense it down & impart the importance of all the little things?

At home, I actually attempted to make Pad Thai.  It turned out ok.  I can see where it can be better.  That I even can see what I need to do to make it better is amazing in itself.  It was even kinda fun!  But shhhh, don't tell anyone!  I wouldn't want to ruin my reputation of being a crappy cook...

On the job front...nothing so far.  And I'm ok with that for now.  I need a job, but I'd like to have some time to clean my house, paint a room or two, clean up the mess in the craft room, establish a new routine.  I'm not sure how long we can go without me being employed, but a couple of weeks will be good for my soul.

I must be bored because I can't think of a thing to say.  I'm drinking coffee at 3:00 in the afternoon & eating Fritos like I may never see them again.  I'm about to hit the m&m's too.  Oops, not about to...they're gone.  I'd better go find something to do...


Monday, January 17, 2011

The weight of the world...

it's been lifted from my shoulders!  I cannot express in words the relief that I feel that the store sale is done.  Inventory is done.  Don't get me wrong...I will miss the store.  But for right now, I am so relieved to just be here as an employee of sorts.  Krista & I get along pretty well.  And that is a great thing!  I am happy to provide her 30 days of training and she is quite aware that once I find a job I won't be here as much.  But until then, I am enjoying my new found sense of relief!

Can you tell?

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

I did it!

I signed the papers today!  And I didn't cry! I've been crying for three days & I didn't cry today!  Not only that, it felt great! This is so amazing!  I'm so excited!

And guess what?  Tomorrow is my cooking class at The Seasoned Kitchen.  Here's what we're making:

Pumpkin Meets Polenta: A Warming Match
Come join Dana as she shares with you how to make warming, nourishing comfort foods paired in unique ways.  The evening will begin with a simple spinach salad with fresh orange slices drizzled with balsamic dressing.  Pumpkin polenta topped with tomatillo avocado salsa fresca will be the center piece of the evening complimented by fresh cooked black beans and fire roasted tomatoes and garlic.  For dessert you will enjoy a homemade gluten free cranberry walnut bread with vanilla coconut ice cream.

Have I ever mentioned that I love polenta?  Add pumpkin to that & I'm over the moon!  And for the first cooking class of the year to be gluten's like they made the class for me!  I'm so excited about it, I went to the Pioneer Woman's website & downloaded a few new recipes to try.  I'm going to have to be Susie homemaker for a bit...and I'm excited!  Woohoo!

Monday, January 3, 2011

A little faith

I have been ridiculously sick with a cold since last Wednesday. I keep telling myself, you're not getting sick, you're not getting sick, but it's not working. I can't breathe & I sound like I have an aquarium in my lungs. I cannot even get out of bed without taking a handful of ibuprofen. And I'm not sleeping.  Between the coughing, the weird dreams & the uncertainty I feel, sleeping is just not happening.  And I'm going to have to stop watching tv before least reality tv.  Saturday night I watched a little of Sister Wives, which is just wrong & then I dreamed about them all night.  Last night I watched a few minutes of Jerseylicious, it too, is just wrong, & then dreamed about it all night.

Lately, instead of "aha moments" I've been having lots of "what the hell have I done!" moments. My gut feeling is that selling the store is the right thing to do. I'm tired. I'm burned out. I seem to have lost my passion for being a business owner. Then someone says or does something sweet & I wonder what on earth am I thinking? How could I sell my store? What am I doing?  Why do I want to be an employee again?  I think most of my fear comes from not having a job to go straight to.  I know I can get a job.  I'm not worried about that.  Honestly, I need a break. A nice, long break. But I'm not sure how much of a break we can afford. In a perfect world, the new owner would decide she'd rather not have me carry & just give me a check for the whole amount. That would alleviate much of the fear & anxiety that I have. I'm sure that's not realistic, but a girl can dream, can't she?

On a positive note, I've come up with my One Little Word for 2011.  It's faith.  It's time for me to have faith in myself.  Faith that things will work out.  I'm making myself a dream board with my word & my goals for 2011.  Don wants to go to Hawaii for our 20th anniversary in September, so there's a photo of Hawaii.  I put a bunch of Monopoly money on it to signify my new income.  I want to learn to sew again (yes, I forgot...I'm not even sure I know how to turn my sewing machine on).  I want to learn Photoshop.  I want to travel.  I want to find my creative place (mine...not someone elses...not something that customers want...mine).  I want to be unburdened by the constant stress I'm under.  I want to be debt free by the time Don retires.  I want to spend more time with my family.  I want to be a better wife.  A better mother.  A better friend.  A better Aunt.  I want to spruce up my house.  I want to be a better homemaker.  I think I want to sell creations on Etsy.  I need less distraction in my life.  Twitter & Facebook will be going away...or I'll be weeding out those that no longer interest me.  And you know what?  I have faith that it'll all work out for me.  I do.  I really do.

I'm putting this on my dream board (It's from Dear Abby, 1/1/11):

Just for Today: I will live through this day only. I will not brood about yesterday or obsess about tomorrow. I will not set far-reaching goals or try to overcome all of my problems at once.  I know that I can do something for 24 hours that would overwhelm me if I had to keep it up for a lifetime.

Just for Today: I will be happy. I will not dwell on thoughts that depress me. If my mind fills with clouds, I will chase them away and fill it with sunshine.

Just for Today: I will accept what is. I will face reality. I will correct those things that I can correct and accept those I cannot.

Just for Today: I will improve my mind. I will read something that requires effort, thought and concentration. I will not be a mental loafer.

Just for Today: I will make a conscious effort to be agreeable. I will be kind and courteous to those who cross my path, and I’ll not speak ill of others. I will improve my appearance, speak softly, and not interrupt when someone else is talking.

Just for today: I will refrain from improving anybody but myself.

Just for Today: I will do something positive to improve my health. If I’m a smoker, I’ll quit. If I am overweight, I will eat healthfully—if only just for today. And not only that, I will get off the couch and take a brisk walk, even if it’s only around the block.

Just for Today: I will gather the courage to do what is right and take responsibility for my own actions.